A Fill Is In Order

Yesterday we went to Texas De Brazil and it wasn't worth it. I had a good time and the food was amazing but the overall experience wasn't worth it to me any more. I was able to eat way to much. I don't know were Phylis (my band) went for the night. Then afterword I felt like crap cause I was so overfull that I wanted to puke! I would say a fill is defiantly in order. Thankfully it was mostly protein. Carbs is what really kills me but holy crap I still cant believe I ate that much. I don't think I have consumed that much in one sitting since pre-band. I have an appointment in 1 week to get a fill. I am looking forward to it.

I am going to try my hardest not to weight myself again till next Saturday morning and see how this week goes. One I don't want to see how bad last night went and 2 I just need to give the scale a break. Stepping on it everyday isn't good for anyone.

Well it's Monday again and I have to head off to work. Hope you all have a great day!
*HUGS*

Yee-haw

Happy Monday everybody. I had a nice weekend of recovery and monkey business. We went out to eat twice and I weighed in this morning at 300.0. So not to bad of a gain. I am going to start back at the gym today after being sick last week. I know it's not going to feel the greatest after taking such a long break from working out. Also this weekend I was noticing just how much of a difference 50lbs has made.

Also as I am looking around blog land this morning I am noticing that the spring challenge is starting and I don't have a picture to put up. I guess I will have to put mine up tonight. Time has just flown by. I didn't realise it was that time already. lol

What does 50lbs mean to me:

-sitting in a theater with my legs up, because its comfortable and i fit.

-not being scared to sit in a chair because it's to small

-being able to workout 5 days a week

-loosing 2 pant sizes.

-sitting on the edge of the bathtub with my feet up.

-more confidence

-less arguing with my husband

-more walks with the dog

-shoes fit better!

- not sweating my butt off when I have to run around at work

-I sleep better

-My husband says I snore a ton less

-I got the courage up to dye my hair again

-almost no heartburn, was taking prilosec every day

-my knees don't hurt anymore, unless I don't workout (weird right)

last but not least (feel free to think dirty)

-RIDE 'EM COWBOY! yep went there :)

Fill Warrior

Well I didn't get all the fill I wanted but I got most of it. I asked for a full cc but my surgeon didn't feel comfortable being out of town for the weekend. So I said lets compromise and do 0.7cc fill. He agreed so I am at 5.2cc in my 10cc band. I could defiantly feel the difference. For dinner I made mini ground turkey covered mushrooms and a bow tie pasta. I had to chew so much my jaw felt like it was going to fall off. When I went to bed at 10:00pm I still felt satisfied though. Then this morning I got full off of 18oz of water. Fingers crossed that this does the job!! A little weirdness...before I ate when I was making dinner I did feel a tad bit nauseous. It went away pretty quickly though. I know allot of people aren't as comfortable as I am being so aggressive with the fills but I only have insurance approval though July to get them done. I know I will have to go back eventually in the future to get adjusted, but hey dive in head first right? :D So for the last couple weeks you have had to hear me bitch and complain about the scale not moving and how I am not losing any weight. How I struggled for that 1.6lb loss this week. Apparently from the 19th of January until today I have lost 12lbs! It was a huge surprise because I thought I hadn't been losing very well. My surgeon was more than pleased with my progress and said I was actually losing faster then he aimed for. I will shut my trap and take the 12lbs with dignity and stop saying "well I could be doing better". Hell I don't even remember the last time I lost 12lbs in 4 weeks, let alone felt bad about not losing more. I have my 2nd personal trainer appointment today and I am so excited to tell her about my 1.6lb lost. I am so thrilled to tell her all about the hard work I have been putting in and get her ideas on how to tweak it a bit. I am also going to see if she can incorporate into the workout training for the Warrior Dash. That is a 5K run/obstacle course that my husband and I are going to do in September. So excited! It would be great to get her input on how to train better for it. Stay tuned for more....

Rambling Questions

Well hello all! I know I have been posting at weird times lately. We have been swamped at work the last couple of days.

I cheated today and stepped on the scale. I'm back to 310.4 today so I am slowly getting back on an even keel. I rescheduled my personal trainer appointment for tomorrow at 4pm. I am really nervous about getting my butt kicked around. After having to cancel last week it was kinda a relief. Now I am in panic mode again kinda. It's completely different to work out at home doing cardio and a little weight stuff. I will let you all know how things go tomorrow when I am done.

Just to change things up a bit I am going answer 5 questions and would like you all to do the same. I am trying to get to know all of you the best I can since we are one big family in blog land :)

1.) Where do you see yourself 5 years from now? I'm not sure were I will be living but I hope to a wonderful thin version of myself with 1 kid and another on the way, with my wonderful hubby.

2.) How happy are you with your appearance? On a scale of 1-10 I would probably say a 4. I have gotten better over the last 40lbs but there is still tons of room for improvement.

3.) What is the one thing you wish you could change about yourself? I wish I could have a more free spirit like I did as a teenager. I have changed a ton since high school and I am held back allot by my weight emotionally. Physically the change will come but I have to work hard on the mental part.

4.) What is the one thing you like most about yourself? I would have to say my eyes. I have always like there shade of brown quite a bit.

5.) What is the one thing you regret the most in your life? Hurting the people I love the most. If I could take those moments I would in a heartbeat.

Now it's your turn :)

Reset Button

I am hitting the reset button today. This morning the scale read 312.2. The only thing I have done right this week is drink my water. I got a nifty new filter bottle :)Talk about your set backs though. I will not make excuses this time, like so many times in the past. I will not push the blame onto someone else, like so many times in the past. I will not fool myself and hide from the scale, like so many times in the past. My solution: I went to my "spots" (you know those spots that you put stuff that no one else can find) and threw out my half eaten bag of resses mini cups. I will avoid eating out at all costs. NO SODA!! I will restart logging my food on my Lose It ipod app. I will reschedule with my trainer because I had to cancel due to the blizzard here. Set backs like the one I had this week are not in the plan if I want to be down 60lbs by my 6yr anniversary. I know I am only human and we all slip up from time to time, but I don't want to be that person again. I have been in that place so many time when I hit 40lbs and everything all goes to hell. In my head all I am picturing is the little devil being picked up and flicked across the room lol. Overall though I had a fun weekend though. On Friday night the hubby and I went for dinner (fried fish and fruit) and drinks (2 huge cranberry and vodka). Then bowling for about an hour. ( I ate the leftovers when we got home :( Yesterday I did good until dinner (meatloaf and parmesan potatoes with biscuits, cant forget the gravy) We had friends over and I drank a couple pineapple, 7up and vodka drinks. We were up till about 3am. Today for the hangover cure that I never get we all went to Denny's. anyone here of the Meat trio? Chicken fried steak, bacon, sausage with eggs, hash browns and an English muffin (with hot chocolate). I didn't eat it all there but I just ate the leftovers about an hour ago. Also for lunch I had a breaded and fried leftover piece of that meatloaf. There you all have it in full food glory. I am not hiding behind my computer screen and pretend that everything was peaches and cream while my weight doesn't change on the ticker. Hopefully on Saturday I can report a back to 309 weight or lower. Hope you all had a great weekend, see you all in blog land tomorrow :) Oh I almost forgot. GO PACK GO!!! Update: PACKERS WIN THE SUPERBOWL!!!!!!! AAAAAA!!!!!!!!

I'm a Jumper BYOC

First of all I have to say that after updating myself in the blog world that my prayers go to Barb and her family. I don't know her but I know what it feels like to loose someone you care for to cancer. I hope that she knows how many people are keeping her in there thoughts. I have noticed a pattern here....my body will be "I don't like you today" and be up 3-4lbs. Then all of a sudden it will drop lower than it had been before. Granted that day is not today but hey like I said yesterday, I claimed that 311 with a vengeance!! So I am a jumper. Frustrating sometimes but kinda cool in the long run. I decided to take a page out of Drazil's book today and do a BYOC (bring your own crazy). Here we go :) 1. Do you believe in love at first sight?• YES! I was on the receiving end of such an event. My husband had seen me during a training event when we were both baby sailors of 18yrs old. He found out who knew me and tricked me into going out with him. 2 months later we got married :) We are going on 6yrs in May, and I am happier then I have ever been. 2. What’s your idea of a romantic evening?• Going out for a small dinner no where fancy, just hanging out with the man and being together. We are truly best friends so just hanging out and talking is perfect for me. 3. Who was your first crush?• I honestly don't remember. I think it was my next door neighbor who was older then me, but I'm not sure. 4. What do you believe is a stronger emotion – love or hate?• Like other people who have posted this question today I don't have a definitive standing on this. I wish I did because then I might be closer to figure this crazy world out. 5. Repeat question: Summarize your life in blog land and in real life. Well in blog land things have been somber in respect and support to Barb who I mentioned. I have had a couple people start following my blog this week and I want to say thank you so much! The more the merrier, I hope I provide you all with the kind of insight that I was able to get from my bandster elders. In real life things have been great! although work is annoying things have mellowed out a bit and are getting better over all. At home I have my wonderful man and my babies (the dog and cats). Workouts have been going good. they honestly could be better but I have the rest of my life to keep improving. I hope you all have a great weekend if I don't show up this weekend. :)

Drunken NSV and Sentiment

I had an awesome NSV on Friday night. On Friday, during work, my husband text me and asked if I wanted to go to Red Lobster for dinner and I was all over that! I love me some crab! Before we got our food I had 3 big glass size vodka and cranberries ( I know, bad Shannon). I haven't drank that much in a long time. We were having a fun night out and I enjoyed my 3 crab legs and cheddar bay biscuit. The restaurant is right next to the mall so we decided to go to the mall to walk off our dinner and drunken state. I went into torrid to look at shirts. I have never been below a size 3 in torrid shirts. My husband just hands me a shirt while I was in the dressing room and says to try it on. It looked fabulous, I was doing my little turn in the mirror and he told me it was a size 2!!! A 2!!! I was so elated! So that was my drunken NSV for Friday. After that we went and picked up some yoga stuff that I have been needing for my work out video. On the way home I finally got the guts to tell my husband how much I love and appreciate his support in all of this. I started blubbering like an idiot and he kissed my hand and said he appreciated me to. He didn't say it but in his own way let me now that he wouldn't want it any other way. We have come a long way in the last year. We had hit a rocky patch that almost ended our marriage. I am so glad we are stubborn enough to have worked through it. I love that man so much there aren't words to truly express it. Today I went to a friends for a baby shower, a lot of people were there that I haven't seen since before my surgery. I got so many compliments, it felt awesome! Frustration has been building for a while now with my lack of restriction, but the last 2 days make me remember that I am getting to were I want to be even if I don't have good restriction yet. It will all just take time. This weight didn't get put on over night and it's definitely not going to come off over night. I have learned so much from these last couple months, from doing things on my own and from all of the blogs I follow. I wouldn't change all of this for anything in the world. I have grown as a person and a wife. I am truly happy, not because I am losing weight (a bonus) but because I am growing as a person and rediscovering who I can really be. I hope all of you have a great rest of your weekend. :)